I finally figured out why I’ve had such a dry streak lately. In an effort to gain the insight into elimination blackjack (EBJ) I went down, deep and dirty. I trolled through the muck and mire of the internet. Google, Yahoo, Ask.com – they were too easy a target. No I used obscure search engines with names too risky to post here. These were the secretive sites that prowled into the bowels of the thing that we have come to know as the World Wide Web. I typed in the usual suspects, blackjack, elimination, winning, etc., all to no avail. I wasn’t looking for just any information. Sure the legends of BJ appeared, Wong, Snyder, etc., I wanted that EXTRA edge, the Holy Grail of information that would separate me from the pack. Suddenly I recalled something that I had heard earlier so I typed in West Coast Grinders. As I waited patiently in the dark stillness of the night my computer screen flickered and momentarily went blank. What had I done I thought, another power outage? Then magically it appeared, what I thought was the magic bullet that would finally give me the edge over the pack. In some obscure format of Adobe Acrobat version 1.666 a pdf labeled, “Hollywoodland’s manuscript”. My heart leapt for joy. I felt like Indiana Jones when he finally discovered the golden idol. Gingerly I moved my cursor to the file and clicked. The screen lit up in colors revealing to me a detailed table of contents. In the margins appeared to be handwritten comments. This looked like an original manuscript that had been scanned into an Adobe file. The joy my heart felt at this new discovery. I was elated that I, FGK, would be the first to employ the West Coast Grinder techniques that were discovered by the legendary HD. Now I would use them to forward my BJ habit! I gleaned thru the text. The first few chapters were fluff dealing with childhood issues and molestation by Catholic nuns. The chapter dealing with the zoo animals and sex education was extremely interested but it had no relevance to EBJ so I pressed on. Finally on page 666 I encountered the first of many formulas designed to identify and profit from EBJ situations. I looked at the symbols as my brain attempted to decipher the codes. Symbols such as beta, delta, alpha, zeta and others flashed across the screen. I rushed to my library and opened my Calculus book. I identified several of the formulas and hurried to memorize them. I hit the save button. Since that time I have been using the formulas with terrible success. I lost almost every game in which I applied the secrets that I had gained. What was wrong? Why wasn’t it working? I returned to that secret pdf file. This time I kept reading. I pressed on past the formulas. I went beyond the pages of numbers until I encountered the final chapter on page 878. Slowly I started to read about the long hours in the Vegas casinos, the use of heated baby oil, the full body leotard suit. Names like Candy, Honeypot, Luscious and others were mentioned along with acrobatic positions and gymnastics. Finally in the corner was a tiny bit of handwriting – Not working for me - Los Angeles Loser! August 2003. Then I turned the page to see what the cover looked like. Oh NO! I guess I had been duped. What I though was an advance addition was merely an early draft a compilation of stories and antidotes designed to thrill and titillate but the formulas that I had so desperately desired were useless! I guess I have to wait until the real book becomes available! So there you have it. All that hard work and effort in search of the EBJ Holy Grail gone! Alas there’s always hope that I can find an advance edition of Kenny Smith’s book. Hope springs eternal. The hunt continues……..
i swear, i feel like i'm practically cheating sometimes when i play -- because i have access to this whole text of knowledge and insight that NO ONE else in the world has at their disposal. Except now for you, Fred. Always, always use the power for good, no matter how badly you are tempted to the dark side. Remember, playing like a complete JAGOFF is its own reward! -hd.
